In the Trenches captures the odd and funny incidents that invariably happen in real estate. Here are the stories submitted this month from real estate professionals all over the country. Don't forget to submit your own funny story!

April 2007

What Are You Lookin’ At?

I recently held an open house for a listing I just placed on the market. It was a rainy day and I wasn’t getting much traffic so I enjoyed the refreshments as I waited. Lo and behold, a couple who previously looked at the home burst through the doors with their two small children, ready to write a contract to buy the home.

As we gathered at the table to get down to business, the wife whispered to me that I had red lipstick smudges around my lips. I was shocked because I don't wear lipstick — especially not dark red lipstick. So I got up to look in the mirror, and gasped! The raspberry Crystal Light I had enjoyed during my downtime left behind a big, red mustache. There was no hiding it. Reluctantly, I confessed: “It’s a Kool-Aid mustache.”

We shared a laugh, but the embarrassment didn’t stop. The couple called over their three-year-old daughter to share in the giggles — and the little girl was wearing the same Kool-Aid mustache as me!
Once we finally controlled our laughter, I finished writing the contract — with a big ol’ Kool-Aid Mustache grin the whole way through!

— Rebecca Pennington, Watson Realty Corp., REALTOR®, Jacksonville, Fla.

Unlikely Roommates

I had a client in a time crunch: to avoid capital gains tax, he needed to buy a condo within a month and move in by the end of the year, which was rapidly approaching. But there was nothing on the market he liked. Finally, I found some people who wanted to sell, and he fell in love with the condo.

I presented the owners with his offer, which included a requirement that he could move into the home in two weeks. That’s where the deal caught a snag — the owners said there was no way they could move out so soon.

Luckily, the snag wasn’t enough to stop the sale. The sellers decided to accept the offer, as long as the buyer didn’t mind moving in with them and using the second bedroom until they were ready to move out.

I’ve never written a contract quite like that one. But the buyer moved in with the sellers, and the roomies lived together for nearly two months.

— Sue Lindsay, Coldwell Banker Burnet, St. Paul, Minn.

And Stay Out!

I often hold seminars at retirement communities because I specialize in helping seniors downsize from their family homes. At one of my seminars, a husband and wife took front row seats, but the husband didn’t look too eager to listen to what I was saying. He just sat there with his arms folded, looking bored and irritated.

Finally, he couldn’t hold back any longer. He stood up abruptly and shouted: “You’ll have to take me out of my home in a box! No one will get me to move!”

His wife then stood up and yelled: “When they take you out in that box, would you take all of your crap with you?”

A good icebreaker. The seminar was a hit.

— Bruce Nemovitz, Realty Executives Lakeshore, Milwaukee

Please note: The above submissions are actual stories submitted by readers. They’ve been edited for clarity and style.

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