A Shriek of Horror
This is Just a Test
What’s Under the Board?

A Shriek of Horror

While showing a fixer-upper late in the evening, I didn't notice a Halloween doormat outside of the front door. When I stepped on it, the mat let out a recorded ear-splitting scream meant to give trick-or-treating children a scare. I let out my own scream so great that, let’s just say, my clients heard the feminine side of my voice. Although I must live with the embarrassment of knowing that I’ve become a funny story that my clients still talk about around the barbecue, I’m just happy they weren’t scared away from buying the property.

—Gerry Montelongo, broker for AVALAR Real Estate in Ventura, Calif.

This is Just a Test

My best friend, who’s also a real estate salesperson, was helping some out-of-town clients find a home for their daughter to live in during college. When they got to the home, my friend realized there was no key in the lockbox. Being the observant real estate practitioner that she is, she noticed a "doggy door" in the back of the house. After getting permission from the listing office, she climbed through and let her clients in the front door. They were very impressed by her dedication, but they soon noticed a strange box hanging from the ceiling. After a closer inspection, my friend saw a note on the box that read "Radon Testing—Do Not Enter!” My friend and her clients ran screaming from the house, thinking they were going to die. They found out eventually that everyone would be fine, although they ruined a very expensive test. She will be reliving that tale for many years to come!

—Jacquie Kellogg, sales associate and property manager for Arizona Mountain Properties in Flagstaff, Ariz.

What’s Under the Board?

I was showing my client a home that was being sold by an elderly man who had lived there with his mother since he was a young boy. The home was in a great location and had a wonderful view, but both the seller and his mother, who recently passed away, were extreme packrats and obviously didn’t clean much. The seller quite proudly showed us around the home, with no idea of the squalor he lived in. When we came to his mother’s bedroom, we noticed a large sheet of plywood on the carpeted floor. Thinking that it might cover some basement stairs, my client lifted the plywood, only to find that it was section of the floor where the carpeting had been cut out. Puzzled, we looked at the seller who explained: “Oh, uh, well, uh … Momma had a wetting problem.” Horrified, my client dropped the plywood and ran out of the house. We had to postpone the rest of the tour so my client could find a place to scrub his hands.

—Kirsten Englund, sales associate with Greg Malik Real Estate Group, Atascadero, Calif.


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