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  Humorous Anecdotes: Open Houses


Following in the Footsteps

Kids learn pretty quickly.

When her house was on the market, Daphne Hawk, a salesperson with King Thompson, REALTORS®, in Grove City, Ohio, overheard the following exchange between her eight-year-old son and his friend.

Friend: I can stay only a little while. We're having an open house tonight.

Son: You're selling your house?

Friend: No, the open house is at school.

Son: You're selling your school?


Lovers Only
"I was never too enthusiastic about open houses—turnout is usually pretty slim," says Joseph Mogel, a salesperson with Coldwell Banker-Battiste, Burlington, N.J. "But since my company was holding its annual spring open house event, I felt duty bound to participate."

During Mogel's three-hour open house, 12 young couples stopped by. "I couldn't understand the overwhelming response until I checked the newspaper ad promoting the open. It read 'Delran-Fox Chase Drive-4 bedroom/2 bath split. Separate bedroom/bath on lover level.'

"Needless to say, I got an offer," he says. Sometimes typos pay off.




Stake a Claim
As I was setting up signs for an open house, I approached a woman working in her yard. I gave her my card and asked whether I could stake a sign at her corner. She agreed, asking how long the sign would remain. I assumed she didn’t want it there very long, so I promised to pick it up at 5:00 p.m.

I wasn’t prepared for her reply: “Oh, that’s good! We’re going out at six, and I couldn’t watch it for you after that.”

But it got better. When I returned to pick up the sign, the woman was waiting outside. She asked, “Could I give your card to my daughter? She wants to buy a home.”

Needless to say, I’m on the case.
Iain McEwan
Coldwell Banker
Kettering, Ohio



A Ringing Endorsement
The marketing technique of relaying previous owners' warm memories of a house to prospective buyers was a bust when Wen Wecherly, a practitioner with Shorwest, REALTORS®, Milwaukee, tried it.

She asked a widow what she liked about her property, and the woman's blunt response was, "Not a damn thing."




Timing Is Everything
That saying about being in the right place at the right time is something Richard Catlett, San Anselmo, Calif., knows something about.

One day the Prudential California Realty salesperson was walking his dog in a rural area near a golf course located along an equestrian trail. He was hunched over looking for golf balls to toss to his dog when he happened to hear the conversation of two approaching horseback riders.

His ears perked up when he heard a woman say, "We're thinking of calling Dick Catlett to sell our house." He popped up and said, "You won't have to call. Here I am." The woman almost fell off her horse.

He got the listing that night. --Elyse Umlauf-Garneau


Marketing Under the Knife
When salesperson Zandra Kessler, Heartland Real Estate, Rochester, Minn., learned she needed surgery, she didn't let the marketing opportunity pass her by. She carried business cards with her to the Mayo Clinic and handed them to the nurses as she was wheeled into surgery.

Before reaching the surgeon, Kessler ran out of cards. Undaunted, she grabbed a Post-It note and wrote, "For all your buying and selling needs, contact Zandra Kessler . . . ," and attached it to her surgical gown.

She knew she had a customer when she came to after surgery and found the surgeon still wearing her note on his jacket. He wore it the three days she was at the hospital.

Because of her hospital marketing blitz, Kessler received several referrals. --Elyse Umlauf-Garneau




Dancing in the Street
After holding an open house for three hours with no visitors, I was happy to see a salesperson I recognized finally drive by. But she didn’t even glance at my listing. Her car stopped in front of a larger, more expensive home down the street.

I was desperate. As the salesperson and the buyer entered the other house, I grabbed a flag and a directional sign and ran to the middle of the street in front of the other listing. When the salesperson and the buyer emerged from the house, they saw me standing in the street waving the flag and pointing the directional sign toward my open house.

“Sorry, but we need something a little larger,” the salesperson coolly remarked. Wearing my best grin, I continued to wave the flag and rock the sign from side to side. The buyer laughingly remarked, “We might as well take a look while we’re here.”

That night I received a surprising phone call. The salesperson said the buyer liked my listing and wanted to make an offer. We completed the deal and closed 45 days later.
Bill L. Burr
RE/MAX Realty Centre
Yorba Linda, Calif.


Hungry for a Sale?
One day a colleague invited me to lunch. But he told me we had to stop on the way so that he could complete one of his new listings. When we arrived at the listing, he and the seller began to fill out some paperwork. To save time, I decided to get the FOR SALE sign out of the car.

As I was mounting the sign in the yard, a couple pulled up and asked whether they could see the house. I showed it to them, and they made a full offer, which the owner accepted.

I really enjoyed my lunch that day, considering that I had made a commission. But the other salesperson had a strange look on his face. I think my quick sale, and the fact that my commission could have been his, really made his lunch hard to swallow.
John P. Chaney
Mays Bowman Realty
West Carrollton, Ohio




The Fastest Sale in the East
As my partner and I left a seller’s home, we noticed that our sign was missing. We saw a Dumpster about 40 feet away and we decided to see whether somebody had dumped our sign in it.

On the way, we met two builders who were renovating an old storefront, and they asked what we were looking for. We explained, and pointed out the house, and they asked whether they could see it right then and there. Within ten minutes they had decided to buy.

That was our quickest deal ever.
Stephanie A. Intoci
American Star Realty of Richmond, Inc.
Staten Island, N.Y.


A Truly Foreign Exchange
On a trip to Moscow, I was in a bank lobby when an American couple came in to exchange money. The black market, located behind the building’s stairwell, offered the best rates, and I asked them why they weren’t using it. They told me they weren’t allowed to because they were with the American Embassy. I smiled and said, “I can.”

After I had exchanged their money, we started chatting. When they heard I was from West Virginia, they mentioned that someone they knew was moving there. “Aha,” I thought, “a referral.” I got the man’s name and moving date.

My roommate said, “Only you would find a referral in Moscow!”
Shirley Jarvis
The Property Shoppe Realty Inc.
Barboursville, W.Va.




Polar Broker
Sandy Meyer knows perseverance. Boy, does she know it.

Her company, Belmont, REALTORS®, is located in lovely, frigid Grand Forks, N.D. But temperatures of 40 below zero, wind chill factors of minus 80, and a record snowfall last winter didn't stop Meyer and her assistant, Linda Melchior from going about the business of marketing.

A photo of them in the artic climate ran on a flyer that Meyer distributed to relocating prospects. And the caption read ''Relocating to North Dakota? Temperature 42 degrees below 0.

''Don't worry, we'll have the driveway shoveled out by your June arrival.'' --Christina Hoffmann Spira

Humor, next page >